I have tried formulating ideas that make sense; not just to me, but also to others. But owing to very basic nature of my psyche, I haven’t been able to go beyond a few lines. So here’s what I have finally come up with – writing jibber-jabber, with a flair that makes the jibber-jabber appear less what it actually is.
Of course, the deepest realm of my rationality would argue that jibber-jabber cannot be more or less, but who’s delving into that corner of the brain in the first place? These days my new motto is first act, then think. Because once we start thinking, even our deepest passions start to get threatened by second, third, fourth and Lord knows how many thoughts. It is said that the human mind is in a state of constant activity. So maybe by acting impulsive, I would probably be doing my mind a huge favour, so to speak.
Impulsiveness, to me requires temerity. It is not easy to break the shackles of years’ long advices and preaches drummed into the head; it requires guts to stand up and say that no, I won’t be stopped now. But more than anything else, it requires steadfastness. Steadfastness, because not everyone you meet is ready to thump your back with pride and say that your act of impulsiveness is being appreciated. Nine times on 10, people hate when you start to think out of the box and try their level best to pull you a couple of pegs down from your potential endeavour of capriciousness.
Coming to think about it, I wonder whether these people purposefully resort to such underhanded tactics because they are jealous. Jealous, because they never thought of changing or breaking the mould and just decided to tread the much-worn path because it was convenient. Or maybe they are just worried, period. After observing the minutiae of the behaviour of people all round me for a considerable period of time, I have realised that worry in individuals manifests itself in a number of ways – abuses, pleading, begging, crying and even physical assault; the last of course, being an irony of the highest order.
However more than these two factors, what strikes me the most about people who rant about unprompted attitude, is their lack of questioning. As a child growing up, I was always taught to stifle my questions about the way things in a society were. There were no answers except for “We never questioned our elders.” Philosophising would provide the answer that asking questions is perhaps the best way to learn, for at no point of time is one self-sufficient to know about everything that needs to be known.
But as usual there seems to be a definite chasm between philosophy and practicality; between asking questions in the classroom and asking questions about societal norms. The former is appreciated and lauded, while the latter is denigrated and slandered. So what’s a sane individual to do? He keeps thinking and mulling about issues, forms his own opinions and judgements, and then finally realises that nothing ever matters – one can never question the society but the society can always question you. Hence, dunking the thinking and slumming life, as it comes and as it takes its weird course...
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